Empty Pockets And Stomach Rumbles

Today I accompanied my client to the fair.

Not a big, fancy fair with fun rides and candy-floss and stuff.

No. It was a charity fair with a coconut shy, hoopla, BBQ, a tombola and plants and stuff for sale.

I thought 'Whoo-hoo! Time to let the good times roll!'.  I thought that a mere 8.5 seconds before I realised that I had no money with me.

I was, in a word, broke.

I'd forgotten to go to an ATM before collecting my client this morning and I only had 26 pence to my name.

There were sausages, burgers, crepes, and a large variety of tooth-rotting candy just waiting to be devoured ... and I was broke!

OK, so technically I wasn't (an am not) flat broke.  I have money.  It just wan't in my pocket when all the those aroma's found their way through the forest that is my moustache and into my nose.

Normally ... that is to say when I have money in my pockets ... I can go the whole day (6.30am to 17.30pm) without eating and I'm never plagued with hunger pangs, intestinal rumbles of desperation or those "boi-oi-oing" noises that emanate from the mid-section.

I survive on the occasional tic-tac or stick of chewing gum without any problems.

Today?

Well, today the thought of my empty pockets drove me nuts and wherever I went I was accompanied by a full intestinal orchestral, which my client found hilarious.

From the moment that first burger started to burn on the grill to the moment I had to take my client home, my stomach played, much to the amusement of anyone nearby, wonderful music, which was referred to by one lady in the crowd as "The Feedmenow Overture in C,D and F".

After dropping my client (who had money and was lucky that I didn't mug him for it) safely back home, I made a mad dash to the nearest ATM with every intention of going to any old greasy-spoon cafe for a huge plate of burger & chips.

But, as things turned out, my aroma induced ravenous hunger had disappeared by the timewe pulled into his driveway.

Lucky me!

I'm home now and I've just enjoyed a coffee with a biscuit so for the moment, I am satisfied.

It's 16.20pm and soon I'll be cooking the evening meal.

I was thinking of burgers, but I don't think anyone else will appreciate them as much as I will.

Perhaps if I throw in a salad?