Morning Moan: Emails From Hell

It may surprise everyone to learn that I can actually see my feet whilst standing.

It may also come as a surprise to all those charlatan pharmacist's on the internet that my feet are not the only things I see when I look down.

I would therefore respectfully like to point out that their kind offer's ... of which there have been over twenty this  morning ... of assistance in the 'appendage' size department are completely unwarranted and unwanted!  I strongly suspect that they, or their agents, have been spying through the cracks of the wrong bathrooms and have mistaken me for someone else.

Oh, yes! To all those wishing for a quick sale of potency medication (and I use the term loosely) I would just like to say ... not yet, chaps!

And to that one particular company that persists in thinking that I am in dire need of the newest, most uplifting experience in mammary support garments, I say ... Even if I were handicapped by the presence of moobs (man boobs) requiring urgent and immediate support, your garment would still not make it onto my list of 'must have' underwear. 


To everyone  else that sends me irritating emails of  one kind or another I would like to say ... Please leave me alone! You are beginning to get on my nerves in a big way.