You're a man of the world, Bert
Worrrrrl, yes! I've had my experiences. Dabbled in loads of things, I have.
So you're a knowledgeable man then, are you?
Oh, yes! Knowledge is my middle name.
Y...you...you changed your middle name, did you?
What?
Did you change your middle name? Because I always thought it was Dennis.
I was speaking wossname ... thingy! I haven't actually changed my name.
Oh! I see. Wossname. Right.
That's right! Anyway, what's on your mind?
I was wondering ... do you know what 'destitution' is?
Who you been talking to?
What?
's not true! 's a lie!
Oh my God! Have you been on the streets?
No...no... well, yes. But I was a student back then and I had money troubles, all right?
Oh! You poor man!
Well, at first, yes. But I was popular and made a lot of money very quickly ....
You managed to make money by being homeless and in dire need?
... but my backside ... What?
Being homeless and/or in dire need is the definition of 'Destitution'.
Oh! I thought you said ...
Showing posts with label poor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label poor. Show all posts
Monday, 2 July 2012
Wednesday, 9 May 2012
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!
I leapt into my cool 'lets get down to blogging' slippers, flung myself onto the sofa ... narrowly avoiding a rather bemused pussy cat ... and flipped open the lid of my laptop, or Lappy, as I like to call her.
She obligingly Window-chimed into life and I directed my mouse cursor towards the Chrome icon and clicked.
Chrome opened.
I clicked open, or at least I attempted to click open, my blog!
'Wey man, lass!' I said in my best Geordie accent. 'Wots aal this hinney?'
I was confronted with a window that declared in rather large letters that my Sky internet connection was unavailable ... AGAIN!
I was advised to try again in a few minutes.
That was at 8pm!
It'snow 11.30pm!
Could it be that Sky operates in a different reality that ticks along at a rather slower pace than mine?
Nope! I think they are just pissing me about!
I am seriously going to have to find another provider, as Sky is really getting to be a pain!
Anyhow, it's bed time for this old man, so please don't go away!
I WILL sort this out!
She obligingly Window-chimed into life and I directed my mouse cursor towards the Chrome icon and clicked.
Chrome opened.
I clicked open, or at least I attempted to click open, my blog!
'Wey man, lass!' I said in my best Geordie accent. 'Wots aal this hinney?'
I was confronted with a window that declared in rather large letters that my Sky internet connection was unavailable ... AGAIN!
I was advised to try again in a few minutes.
That was at 8pm!
It'snow 11.30pm!
Could it be that Sky operates in a different reality that ticks along at a rather slower pace than mine?
Nope! I think they are just pissing me about!
I am seriously going to have to find another provider, as Sky is really getting to be a pain!
Anyhow, it's bed time for this old man, so please don't go away!
I WILL sort this out!
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