It's Over!

I am pleased to report that Christmas has been and gone ... and I survived!!!

Having been up since 5am and then going home (from work) to start all that cooking - pizzas, sausage rolls, bread buns, chocolate filled pastries, etc. - for our post Christmas lunch banquet, I was knackered!

Luckily though the 'bird' and 'accessories' were all to be prepared by the 'missus' so I was allowed a little bit of 'me' time ... in which I came down with a touch of 'man flu'!

Yes, I was coming down all the symptoms of flu ... aching joints, sniffles, wheezing cough, chest pains and a blinding headache ... and it all happened so quickly!

As much as I wanted to, I couldn't relax. So, despite the cold, I tool the pups to the park .

Don't worry! I was well wrapped up!

An hour into my walk with the dogs I received a phone call.


Julie:  I've just called my parents and Susan to ask what time they'll be arriving this afternoon.
Me:  When are they coming?
Julie:  1pm ... for lunch!
Me :  Oh!  Did we know they were coming for lunch?
Julie:  They say that they come to us every year Christmas lunch.
Me:  They do?
Julie:  That's what I was going to ask you.
Me:  I'm on my way home now.
Julie:  Will that stop them from coming?
Me:  Maybe not, but it will give me time to hide.


I hung up and headed home.

Back at the car park there was a confrontation between Sym (of whom I am the 'daddy') and a pretty brave squirrel. There was a stand-off, in which the squirrel clung head down to the trunk of a tree some three metres above Sym's head.

Sym, for his part, was going through his entire doggy repertoire ... barking, jumping, spinning, whining, growling and head side-to-siding ... in order to get it. But the squirrel, in what passes as the squirrel version of Dirty Harry impression ...


"Did he fire six nuts or only five?" Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I kind of lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Oak Tree, the most powerful tree in the world, and could knock your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?"

... just stared at him.

I couldn't wait for this situation to resolve itself so I put Sym back on the leash then dragged him off to the car.

He was not impressed.

Back at home I found that measures had been implemented to increase the amount of veggies that would accompany the 'bird', thus making our Christmas lunch stretch to accommodate an additional three guests.

Julie had cut all the veg in half and had swapped the large dinner plates for the smaller ones! Clever!!!

Anyway, presents where swapped, "thank you's" exchanges. Lunch was devoured and the afternoon was spent chatting and playing silly games. Then like magic the table was re-loaded with ham and turkey slices, pickles, cheese, pizzas, sausage rolls and an assortment of other finger foods and we all began to eat again.

Totally stuffed, the 'outlaws' decided that enough was enough and it was time to go home.

After many hugs, "thank you's", and "drive carefully's" , they departed and we tidied away the debris then flopped in front of the TV to watch Shrek Forever After: The Final Chapter.

Then it was bedtime!

Dog's were sent out to pee and poo; cat's were put out for the night; doors were locked.

I was last upstairs!

Now, do you remember that I mentioned the 'man flu' thing? Well, by this time I was really suffering.

I couldn't sleep so I ended up back in front of the TV in the living room armed with a Lemsip and box of tissues.

At 3.30am, I went to bed and succumbed to sleep.

By 8am I was up to feed the doggies!

I am still feeling like sh*t, but at least the horrors of Christmas day are behind me!