About This Blog

This blog was originally started as a thread on the forum pages of an animal rescue site. Now it's here!

The articles you find in here are purely for entertainment (yours and mine) and (with one or two exceptions) are all tongue-in-cheek chronicles of the World (my bit, anyway) as I see it.
No disrespect is intended towards anyone unless I make a mistake and make it too obvious.

I hope you enjoy my offerings. Feedback and comments of any kind are welcome.


Wednesday 28 December 2011

How To Dump Yourself Into A Whole Heap Of Trouble

It's simple!

You ask a question.

There was a note on the table when I eventually dragged my backside downstairs.  I read it as I tried to wake myself up with a strong coffee.

The Mrs. had gone to work and, as I was having an unexpected day off, she had left a note.  A short one which was, in actual fact, just a list of things that I was meant to have finished by the time she got home.
  • Vacuum.
  • Tidy away all the Christmas presents that I'd received and left lying on any flat surface.
  • Put away the spare chairs that we had to pull out to seat everyone around the table on Christmas day (which I said I would do after the Christmas meal and conveniently forgot).
  • and a few other little things
Not much really.  But there was also the regular stuff that I do as a matter of course.
  • Taking the dogs to the park
  • Prepare the evening meal 
  • Walk the dogs in the evening
I'm sure there's other stuff  too, but I'll be blowed if I can remember what they are, but I'm sure they're very important jobs.

Anyway, she came home and that's where the question comes in.

Any man feeling hard done by would probably ask the same question.

I met her when she came through the front door I immediately reeled  off the list of jobs, each item punctuated with a sharp "Done"!

As she removed her coat and hung it on the hook behind the door she said "Well done"!

Then I asked it!

"So" I said.  "Remind me. What is it you actually do around here"?

The silence was deafening, the room suddenly frosty.

Her stare nailed me firmly to the wall and held me there. She uttered no sound, she just slowly turned and walked passed me and up the hallway towards the kitchen.

We haven't talked for over an hour, but I think she's softening.  

Well, she's stopped throwing plates, cups and saucers at me anyway.

I'm pretty sure that I'll be able to apologise in another hour or two without sustaining any life threatening injuries.

Pray for me!




* This is all made up because I would never have the nerve to ask her that question in the first place, but now you know what  would happen if I ever did.

8 comments:

  1. Ooooooooohhhhh.....good thing it was all made up.
    I would put this in the same category of answering the following question honestly, "Do these make me look fat?"
    Ooooooooohhhhh........

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  2. Never, ever answer a "Does my bum look ..." question.

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  3. i was going to say that i thought you were smarter than that. egads that would be stupid!

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  4. You really put your foot in your mouth this time and now you're in the bad books and probably won't live this one down for a very long time maybe never :-).

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  5. I was going to ask just how long you've been married! I figured it couldn't have been long if you had dared to ask that! Good thing it was made up.

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  6. So the crockery is no longer airborne -- that's promising.

    :-)

    You'll have to let us know if you slept with one eye open!

    Pearl

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  7. I thought you were much too smart and married to long to have really asked that question... A wise man knows what NOT to ask...

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Any and all comments are welcome ...