There must be a TWS* on every bus route.
There certainly was today. And the bus was gibbous** with passengers!
TWS's, for those unaware of their purpose, are intended to fulfil one function only; they facilitate KBOS*.
As a by-product however, they manage to generate a certain amount of PR*, which results in POP* and, if not countered effectively, eventually BRAWL*!
Too much POP = BRAWL!!!
Today we narrowly missed BRAWL (due to the passenger involved being over 80 years old) and achieved a minor BOAA* instead, which held us up for approximately five minutes.
At the WTS, the granny (let's call her Edna!) shouted to the driver "I'm getting off at the next stop! Could you please get a move on or I'll pee all over the seat".
The bus driver, without looking, shouted back "Regulations! Sorry!"
Edna at this point stood up and began a shuffling, stamping dance whilst holding her hand to her nether regions. "This is ridiculous! I'm getting off now!"
She stamped to the front of the bus and got off.
The rest of us looked on (out of the window) as Edna high-tailed it onto a patch of waste land behind the bus shelter and, still clearly visible to all of us, dropped her bag, hiked up her coat and skirt and, without regard to all and sundry, took a leak!
This prompted a number of chuckles as Edna took her unscheduled relief and more than a few verbal reprimands and derogatory comments aimed at the driver who, wrapped in his impenetrable armour otherwise known as 'regulations', ignored us entirely.
He did however allow Edna, now simultaneously blushing and seething with anger, to re-board the bus.
It was just another day on the buses.
How was your day?
* TWS = Time Wasting Stop
KBOS = Keep Bus On Schedule
PR = Passenger Resentment
POP = Pissed Off Passengers
BRAWL = Brawl
BOAA = Bit Of An Argument
** I'm so pleased I found space for this word without mentioning the moon!
About This Blog
This blog was originally started as a thread on the forum pages of an animal rescue site. Now it's here!
The articles you find in here are purely for entertainment (yours and mine) and (with one or two exceptions) are all tongue-in-cheek chronicles of the World (my bit, anyway) as I see it.
No disrespect is intended towards anyone unless I make a mistake and make it too obvious.
I hope you enjoy my offerings. Feedback and comments of any kind are welcome.
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