Drama King

Wheels have turned and, as you would expect, things have happened.

Some good ... some bad!

I can report that the road outside my house has, at last, been resurfaced and white lines have been painted at the junctions!

If it hadn't been so cold outside, we would have been tempted to hold an impromptu street party in celebration.

One thing that was celebrated (with a can of lager) was the completion of repair work on our garage roof.
The old roof ... described by the roofers as 'Weetabix' because of the way it crumbled ... was stripped away and new boards were laid on Thursday. On Friday it was sealed with a fibreglass resin which, surprise-surprise, both cats promptly walked through, necessitating some frantic and, for my part, painful paw-cleaning.

On the plus side, it means that the cracked wall can now dry out and be repaired. On the negative side ... it cost me two thousand pounds!

Actually, now that I think of it, they were the only two good things, except that I got paid at the end of the month.

Bad things have also happened.

Some things have pissed me off.

Some have had me fuming.

Others have made me sad.

But I am a roughie-toughie ex-soldier and I have to stand firm in the face of adversity.

I have to be the strong, sensible voice of reason in this difficult time.

I must be a rock of stability in this time of crisis!

Or, as my wife would put it, I have to stop running around like a headless chicken.

Women!

What are they like?

They have no idea how hard it is being a man and even less sense of drama!

Misunderstanding

You're a man of the world, Bert
Worrrrrl, yes! I've had my experiences. Dabbled in loads of things, I have.
So you're a knowledgeable man then, are you?
Oh, yes! Knowledge is my middle name.
Y...you...you changed your middle name, did you?
What?
Did you change your middle name? Because I always thought it was Dennis.
I was speaking wossname ... thingy! I haven't actually changed my name.
Oh! I see.  Wossname. Right.
That's right! Anyway, what's on your mind?
I was wondering ... do you know what 'destitution' is?
Who you been talking to?
What?
's not true! 's a lie!
Oh my God! Have you been on the streets?
No...no... well, yes. But I was a student back then and I had money troubles, all right?
Oh! You poor man!
Well, at first, yes. But I was popular and made a lot of money very quickly ....
You managed to make money by being homeless and in dire need?
... but my backside ... What?
Being homeless and/or in dire need is the definition of 'Destitution'.
Oh! I thought you said ...

Walk, Granny! Don't Run!

Once again I braved the early morning roads, on what should have been my morning off, in order to cover for an absent colleague.

Through sixteen miles (there and back) of stop-start traffic I struggled, along with all those other plonkers (who were obviously to blame for everything), in a desperate bid to earn my wage.

It was 06.45 when I mounted my trustee steed (my car, but a horse would have been quicker) and took off into the darkness and pouring rain.

I managed a magnificent half mile before being halted by the first of many delays ... a mini-bus trying to do a three point turn on a narrow street.  After about twenty 'points' he managed it and cleared the road, much to everyone's (there was a queue of about twenty cars by this time) delight.

Of we set again, through Llandaff North, past BBC Cymru (Wales) and into Llandaff itself.  Mere minutes it took me to arrive in Llandaff but it took another twenty before I could leave and head towards Canton.

And Llandaff isn't like, you know, big.  It's a titchy little patch of Cardiff's greater metropolitan region and usually it's behind me in two or three minutes.

It was, I discovered to my utter horror, dustbin day and the Refuge Collection Operatives (grubby men in fluorescent jackets) were out in force.

Canton, I feared, would be no better.

It wasn't!

Anyway, the eight mile journey - twenty minutes on a good day - robbed me of fifty-five minutes of my life.

After I had completed my call, I headed home again but by this time Cardiff's drivers were out in force and were all desperately trying to get to work on time.

Stop!

Start!

Stop!

Start!

I left my client at a little before 08.30 and managed to pull into my driveway at 09.35.

Cars, buses, trucks and cyclists are a pain and I complain (justly) about them far too often but it occurred to me this morning that there is another area of complaint well worth mentioning.

Pedestrians!

They ignore the pedestrian signals and just keep on crossing the roads with a 'What the hell! They're doing it' attitude.

And there is always ... always ... a granny at the back of them who ties to walk across with them. But, when granny realises that she has been left behind and is alone in front of a hoard of pi$$ed off drivers, she tries to break into a jog, somehow contriving to become even slower in the process.

And it's a safe bet that once she's started doing her impersonation of Usain Bolt, she will drop something and spend another couple of minutes doing the 'old person' squat (whilst groaning about her poor old back) and  try to pick it again.

It can be an excruciatingly painful thing to watch, but no one ever leaves their car to assist  lest they themselves fall under the hateful glare (and a few choice words) of their fellow motorists.

There you have it.

A completely unimportant semi-rant about road users and pedestrians.

Reading this may not have been your cup of tea, but writing it has certainly taken the edge of my lust for blood and the doing of physical harm to my fellow man!

I'm sure though that after today's vehicular experience that I am only one of many that have taken to the  Bloggi-verse in order to vent off steam.

Damn it!

I have to go back to work in twenty minutes.

The End of Jack Duckworth

As any Corrie fan will know, Jack Duckworth passed away last night.

But did anyone recall what song was played in the background as he left The Rovers Return?

No?

Well I'll tell you...

It was Bill Tarmey, aka Jack Duckworth, singing his version of Wind Beneath My Wings.

Just thought it was worth a mention.

I think it was a very nice gesture of the 'Corrie' production team to mark the 31 years of Bill playing 'Jack'.