About This Blog

This blog was originally started as a thread on the forum pages of an animal rescue site. Now it's here!

The articles you find in here are purely for entertainment (yours and mine) and (with one or two exceptions) are all tongue-in-cheek chronicles of the World (my bit, anyway) as I see it.
No disrespect is intended towards anyone unless I make a mistake and make it too obvious.

I hope you enjoy my offerings. Feedback and comments of any kind are welcome.


Friday, 29 June 2012

The Frighteners!

Sometimes, not often, the cafe where my client and I have our mid-morning coffee is quite full.

Today it was full to the rafters, but we managed to find a free table and settled ourselves down before ordering a sausage roll and coffee (for me) and a tea (for my client).

Then two women of approximately my age asked if the other two chairs at the table were taken and would we mind if they sat there.

I said they were free and it would be fine for them to sit down.

We went through that initial awkward silence as they sat, followed quickly by an even more awkward attempt at conversation, before they settled to their conversation and we to ours.

Our conversation was, as you would expect when chatting to someone with learning difficulties, somewhat limited ... so I eavesdropped!

At first they talked about their kids and universities, before going on about shopping and prices.

Then the following was said:

Woman 1: I could have killed my old man last night!
Woman 2: Why? (there was a heavy sigh) What'd he do?
W1:          Nothing! He was just there!!! 
W2:          Ah!  One of those day's, was it?
W1:          Oooooo! He just sat there watching the football!
W2:          Men!!! Your's is no different to mine.
W1:          Then he said 'Get me a beer, love' and that was it!
                 I screamed and went to bed.

W2:          It's  (this next words were whispered with very exaggerated lip movements)
                The Change.
W1:          You think so?
W2:          Well you are of a certain age, Joan!


They then went on to scare the bejabbers out of me by going through the symptoms of the menopause.

    Let's go back, for a moment, to my childhood because, as I recall,there were many 'women of a certain age'
    around then.  I can remember 'The Change' being mentioned in that same half whispered mime by some
    of the females in our clan.


    I had no idea what it meant but when the words "I'm going through the change" were uttered, I thought 
    they were sorting out their pocketful of pennies, so I would always get my money box out.

They listed and discussed about 37 (thirty-seven) of the most prominent symptoms of the 'change'.

The symptoms, including depression, range from this ...


... to this ...
image borrowed from HERE
(I hope they don't mind)
Scary, isn't it?

And the most frightening of all is that one day, maybe soon, my wife (better known as 'She Who Must Be Obeyed') will become one of those 'Women of a certain age' and I will be in the cross-hairs of frustration.

I'm going to move into the garden shed when things get tough!

8 comments:

  1. I can tell you from first hand experience that everything they say about "the change" is true. My lovely , affectionate wife turned into a snar---I better not. She might read this.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Or I might have sent her your comment!

      Delete
  2. I'm glad to be single so don't have to put up with the change stuffing up my life :-).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. But you miss out on all the other 'goodies'.

      Delete
  3. I've got my eye on Mrs. Penwasser. She's a walking time bomb.
    Interesting that the women just sat down at your table instead of moving the chairs elsewhere (unless there was no room to do so).
    You must be a very friendly looking fellow.
    Who won't be going through any "change."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm sure Mrs. P is ready to explode at any minute.
      I have a friendly disposition but a severe face that some people say makes me look aggressive, but I'm a pussy-cat really. And there were only one or two places they could have sat, but not together.

      Delete
  4. My wife's menopause, from 2005 to 2007, scared the living Sh&t out of me. There were times I would have not been surprised if she had me that same question about who gave me permission to breath.

    Got you on my blogroll.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Some folks have emailed me their "experiences" and I've gotta say, I'm quaking in my boots! I fear, if not for my life, then certainly for one or two limbs when THAT time comes.

      Thanks for slapping me on your blogroll!

      Delete

Any and all comments are welcome ...