Tissues are essential when you go out in the freezing cold to walk the dogs.
I mean, I have a moustache and, believe it or not, there is nothing worse than a 'tasche' full of snot.
Oh yes, you can sniff your way around the park, each sniff requiring more effort than the last and seemingly drawing less and less back into the snot sanctuary, otherwise known as your nose.
The trouble with sniffing ... I mean, the danger of sniffing ... well, it's micro-fractures to the inside of you skull, isn't it!
If you are a sniffer, then you will have experience of at least one, if not more, of those high velocity, quick release, double density snots.
You know the ones!
They are the ones that with every sniff move inside the nostril but only just enough to cause a modicum of irritation, not enough to release them from their anchorage.
Then, when you have given up all hope of ridding yourself of the unwelcome nasal guest, the 'quick release' is activated as you try to sniff your top lip free of dribble.
There is an audible 'THWUCK' as it releases, followed a fraction of a second later by a very quiet 'TOK' as the snot, travelling by this time at the very high speed, seems to make contact with the inside of the base of you skull. The micro-fracture!
OK! So the irritation is gone, but you are then faced with that awful feeling as you realise that the snot has nowhere to go but down.
There is a gulp, a grimace and, perhaps, then a few seconds of nausea, as you try to come to terms with the latest addition to your diet.
They say "Shit happens" but, my friends, so does the 'bullet' snot!
Any sniffer will tell you ... it really is worth checking your pockets for tissues before you go out in the cold!
About This Blog
This blog was originally started as a thread on the forum pages of an animal rescue site. Now it's here!
The articles you find in here are purely for entertainment (yours and mine) and (with one or two exceptions) are all tongue-in-cheek chronicles of the World (my bit, anyway) as I see it.
No disrespect is intended towards anyone unless I make a mistake and make it too obvious.
I hope you enjoy my offerings. Feedback and comments of any kind are welcome.
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