It was reported on the news (BBC no less) that a recent study in the USA (had to be, didn't it!) has discovered that girls really do prefer bad boys to good ones.
I wish I'd known this 35 years ago!
Well, it's time to set the records straight.
I AM BAD!
Let me tell you just a few of my 'bad boy' antics.
- I once dipped my finger into the peanut butter jar and licked it clean ... TWICE! And I didn't tell anyone!
- I once licked my knife in a restaurant!
- It was ME that licked the cake mix bowl out even though I knew my step-daughter wanted to do it.
- I once told a policeman to F*** OFF! (It wasn't my fault he was to far away at the time).
- I have crossed roads against the red light on many occasions.
I can just imagine all you 'bad-boy' lovers drooling over the prospect of hooking up with such a wicked individual as myself, however I must disappoint you all!
I am already taken!
So form an orderly queue at the back door and wait until the wife has gone out.
I am already taken!
So form an orderly queue at the back door and wait until the wife has gone out.
(for a small fee I will email you my address)
Don't all rush at once!
There is enough of me to go around!
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